Rooftops: Lostprophets

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

What Hurts the Most....

Is not being able to give them a hug and say "goodnight, I love you" every night, so that you're sure, if you die in your sleep, they knew you loved them..
Is knowing I can't be the older brothers for Benji
Is sitting down at the table and thinking "wait, not everyone is here".....
It's not having those other two opinions on Friday night when we're all arguing about what movie to watch.
Is knowing when when you just need one of those hugs only a big brother can give, that you can't have it.. yet.
Is not being able to be there for them when they need me and vise-versa
It's knowing that when I end this post and go inside that they're not home..
Is not having two more people teasing me..
Is knowing that they're growing up without me..
Is, when we Skye or talk on the phone, I can here them and see them but I can't touch them
It's not being able to get into trouble with them.. :) Or having them there when I get into trouble to tell me off.
Is knowing that no matter how loud I yell they wont be able to here me.. :)

~What hurts the most.. Is having the two people that are closest to my heart, be so far away from my hand.. ~

(yup, this is my bub- Allen)

(and this find fello I call Zachary)

This post is for my big brothers.. you maybe be thousands of miles away, but that distance doesn't weaken my love for you any! Miss you more then you know.. Thanks for being my older brothers..

(and these are my siblings.. I love them all so much and more.. :) what can I say, they're my best friends.. my heros, forever and always!)

And here is a video of me having fun and getting into trouble with some brothers of mine :) hehe- so much fun..


Charity said...

I know. I miss them. But we shall be together again soon, Lord willing. We can look forward to that AND look back at all the lovely memories we have together. And hopefully we have lots more memories to make together. I mean, think about it. Can't you just see a bunch of Blackwood cousins playing together? Hahaha, I can't wait.

Charity said...

awwwwwwww, I just had to comment again because I love that song so much! Can I sing it at your wedding? (*insert phrase that should not be seen by other eyes*) I don't know why people don't comment, because you are just faaaantastic. Ha, that is such a 90's word. You know why? Because they keep using it on ER: 1st Season! Haaaa. You're making my bed! Well, not really. You just lovingly put my doona cover on my doona that is actually your doona but is now mine because we just traded because mine always falls off the edge of my very high bunk and you wanted a bigger one anyway so now we are both just dandily happy, besides the fact that we are both emotionally scarred from our recent babysitting experience, and I am just the BEST English teacher in the world because I am writing the world's largest run-on sentence!!!! I think I shall make the rest of my bed. And then sleep in it. After I listen to this song again.

....bye. :D loveyas.

Mariaj said...

I read it, and am commenting. I just don't keep up with blogs these day, even my own...especially my own.

anyways, enough with excuses. That was a beautiful post, sorry I didn't read it earlier. I love the song, I want to see the movie that it is from.

I wish they were here too! but they do know you love them, even if you can't give them a hug, the last time you saw them in person, what do you think that last words you sad were? Or the last thing you did to them was? most likely I love you and *hug*

remember our broken hearts??? :D

Kathryn said...

Hello Miss Tamara! I just wanted to let you know that that is one of the sweetest posts I have ever read. I cried as I read it with that really cute song playing in the background. And then I laughed when I watched the little video at the end. (That was really funny!) I hope that you know how much I love you and pray for you guys since you are so far away! You are such a beautiful girl inside and out and you really shine for Christ! I love you!

ben j. said...

itsabirthday! I might just have to sing about it later...

Me, Myself, and I said...

i thought i already commented on your post! hmm, but records prove me wrong...yet again.

dear, i know what you mean. someday we all shan't ever be separated again! everytime i get down about the distance of family, i think, "hey, this is just for a bit now. someday we all be together again and then we shall just separate one last time before we stay together forever! (which makes me think of that song at the end of Grease...don't really know why...) whoo hoo! remember James1:2-4.

and remember my phone number! that's another biggie ;)

love you twin-girl!

Me, Myself, and I said...

unimportant fact for you: i'm eating these rather nasty tasting, ::extremely:: crunchy, un-cooked noodles...this one seriously tastes how baby food carrots smell!!! it's disgusting. and yet, i reach for another...
take care! :)

eelder said...

I really liked that movie, "Once"! Love the song that you posted from it. :) I thought it had a really refreshing end, don't you think??

How's your week been lovely??

-- Eleni

Teen Reader said...

Hey..please check out my blog! And tell your friends on blogger and off I suppose..THANKS!!

Josh said...

Hey TAMARA! I haven't heard much from you on here recently :( So you have to make up for it by talking to me at Calvin. We can do cave man impersonations together. When are you coming in?